Aries: Tortoises If you're an Aries, you want excitement and enthusiasm. Aries people get bored easily, and a tortoise will amuse them for about 15 minutes, tops.
After the novelty wears off, the reality of having a pet rock with a face sinks in. There is no excitement. You can't take your tortoise on a backpacking trip to Europe.
Taurus: Snakes Taurus folks strongly value affection in their relationships. It seems obvious, but a snake isn't the best choice if you're in the market for a pet that loves you back.
Gemini: Horses Geminis are the intellectuals of the astrological calendar. Have you ever met a horse? They're big and beautiful, but they are not exactly masters of wit.
Horses need to be gradually desensitized to everyday sounds and objects, like cars, barking dogs and even plastic bags.
Cancer: Scorpions Cancers value kindness and sensitivity, and the allure of a sinister-looking scorpion will not be appreciated by a Cancer.
To them, what could possibly be cool about owning a giant bug with pinschers and a venomous stinger?